Work has been more or less the same, the routine is starting to sink in pretty well, most of the calls I take per day are installs, reinstalls, transfers, someone unpinned all the windows and floated them all over the place, push upload button recieve work completed, and so on. The company Christmas Party was last night at Belleni’s in Evergreen Walk, and it was pretty good. Food was pretty good and the gift exchange went pretty well, I bought a Nerf N-Strike Maverick for the exchange and it went to Keara, I got a basketball hoop and ball for a cubicle, very cool. I also got a $50 gift card from my boss to Best Buy, which I thought was nice. Worked 4.5 hours at Panera today before going home early because business was slow for the “great snowstorm” that is just now starting. Ha.
Overall though, the job has been good, we’re moving to a new building in E. Hartford near Margaritas next month, a weekend or two is being used to move, set-up, and wire up stuff, so that will be tiring and full of overtime. I seem to be getting flak from Ahad for giving more of a damn than apparently I should with some customers, like babysitting the upload button on this one lady yesterday, but you know, I didn’t have much else to do and I figured if I made it look like I was doing stuff, she wouldn’t call back, and she didn’t. Pays to know a few psychological tricks to the trade. =D
As for daily life, well, it was mostly the same until a couple days ago. I’ve hit some… well… issues with my significant others, most of which I don’t feel like detailing on here, but suffice to say it has sort of left my thoughts and emotions into a perpetual state of limbo. On one hand, I am scared of regressing back into a shell state like I did post-breaking up with my ex due to her manipulating my emotions, and it took me awhile to place full trust in my current relationship, and when I thought I had, something came along and shattered that entire foundation, and right now I feel as if I can never obtain happiness, no matter how hard I work for it. Maybe it’s just me, maybe I am overthinking the box so to speak, but I am a person with fairly construct values and mechanisms, and I haven’t deviated from them really over the years, about the only thing different from me since my last relationship is I’ve become maybe a bit more harder around the edges, but I still have a squishy soft core, and that’s what bothers me the most, I feel that I am going to just sit by and let everything unfold and beat me until I just run away again to keep from being completely torn apart. There is a lot to relationships and human emotions I don’t know about, I don’t “play the field” like most people do, I just want a nice quiet life 80% of the time. I’m just not into the kind of thing people are these days, wild parties, wild encounters, it’s just not me.
I dunno, I wish I had more people to talk to about these things, I do have a couple friends to talk to, but they lack some of the perspective I am looking for, and my parents aren’t too helpful because I feel they will be judgmental against her.
Relationships are troublesome sometimes. The things we do to be happy if only for a short lifetime.